Trust
by heartlandiansoisle
Summary: Cassandra thinks Caleb's cheating on her, and Amy can't help but think why that's Cassandra's first assumption. / Spoilers up to 10x11 A/N: Few thoughts that emerged after watching episode "Change of Course".


"You're breaking up with him...?" Amy checked if she had heard what Cassandra had said right.

She was offering her friend muffins in the comfort of her own loft kitchen and being a good hostess, whilst simultaneously trying to find ways to keep Cassandra at Heartland as long as possible while Caleb was getting his and Cass' things ready for a secret romantic get-away trip to Lake Louise, where he would propose to herself. Cassandra didn't know this yet, of course, and Amy had promised to help keep Cassandra busy meanwhile as she really wanted to support her friends with this next step.

Amy was also supposed to do some damage control after she and Cassandra had witnessed Caleb getting in his truck with a mysterious blonde this morning outside a restaurant.

"He's just... not being honest with me," was Cassandra's defense. She seemed desperate and tired of thinking about everything that must have gone on behind her back.

Amy couldn't really tell her she was wrong, because she herself knew that Caleb wasn't being honest - but for a good reason. Being the romantic guy that he was, Caleb wanted to keep the proposal a surprise, so Amy had sworn not to let Cassandra in on it, but if things kept going this way with his girlfriend, she wasn't sure how much longer she could hold it in.

What Caleb didn't seem to realize was how hard it was for her to defend him without coming off like a totally bad friend or sounding like she knew something was going on and she was only trying to cover it up for Caleb. What could she even say if she was supposed to be so oblivious to what really was going on?

"Don't you think he deserves another chance?" Amy asked, hoping that after Cassandra would give him another chance, he would get down on his knee and all this would be understood and forgotten.

"Last night his phone rang," Cassandra began displaying the evidence for Amy, "and he wouldn't pick it up; he said it wasn't important." Her eyes narrowed as the suspicion crept in again as she was saying the words out loud. She knew she had to explain further if she wanted to win Amy over and hoped that the means would justify the cause. "And I'm not proud of this, but... I couldn't stand it, so I checked his phone. And it was locked", she confessed.

Amy blew air through her lips, making it seem like what Cassandra had just said was reaching. "Yeah, but there could be lots of reasons-"

"Caleb's never had a password!" Cassandra pressed quickly, cutting Amy mid-sentence, "So why does he suddenly have one?" Understandably Amy didn't want to think something like this from her old friend, but Cassandra needed Amy to understand the circumstances she had found herself in. "Because he's hiding something," she answered her own question.

Amy kept listening to her take on the whole thing and she knew she was supposed to continue defending Caleb because she knew for a fact there was nothing Cassandra had to worry about.

But instead of going on about that and pushing Cassandra away by making her think she was paranoid, Amy decided a different approach.

"Okay..." she gave in a little and sat down to keep her company, "I'm not saying you're wrong, but... I guess I'm just wondering why you were so sudden to assume the girl is Caleb's secret... lover."

Cassandra didn't seem to understand why Amy was even asking that. Of course she was!

"Hello? Did you see her? She was totally gorgeous and just his type," Cassandra replied, taking one of the muffins from the plate. She wasn't hungry, but she needed something to demolish so she wouldn't start freaking out big time as the topic obviously wasn't very comfortable for her.

"Yeah, but... is every girl really "a threat" to you whenever they are around him?" Amy asked, "Am I...?" She knew that she and Caleb had had a thing once upon a time, but that was long time ago and her feelings had since then been buried as were his for her, so she could use herself as an example to prove a point.

"Well, no, but... you're... you," Cassandra said, knowing she wasn't making a very good case but was hoping that Amy would know what she meant. "I know you're totally in love with Ty, so I don't have to worry about you. Besides I trust you wouldn't do that to me."

"Do you trust him...?" Amy asked the most important question.

It gave Cassandra something to think about as she was silent for a long time, trying to think how she would put it.

"I want to, but..." Cassandra said, shrugging, not really knowing what to say. "For some reason I can't. I don't know if it's because we are so different, or... something else. Like, maybe I fear that he finds the perfect girl from someone else."

"Do you think maybe you fear that he would cheat on you because... that's how you got started so you know he's not afraid of getting involved with cheating if he feels like he's found the right girl...?" Amy played a therapist, being careful as she knew that this probably wasn't something Cassandra wanted to talk about, especially after her ex, Jesse, had turned out to be such a jerk.

"Thanks, Amy, you've just made this even worse!" Cassandra said, now feeling even more sure that Caleb had a secret lover. If he had done such a good job hiding their affair when this whole relationship had started, it made him capable of doing it again - only this time she was the one being cheated on.

"No, no, come on," Amy pleaded and grabbed Cassandra's hand over the table when she was about to leave. "I didn't mean it like that. I'm just trying to understand why you don't trust him. That's the most important thing in a relationship, especially if you're thinking of taking this relationship to a next level," she said vaguely, hoping she was making some ground work for Caleb later on.

"I don't think there's going to be a next level..." Cassandra said, looking sadder now as she stood by the table, still one foot out of the door. "How can I trust him when he won't even tell me the truth?"

"What if he is telling you the truth, but you just don't wanna see it?" Amy suggested, knowing from her own experience how hard it could sometimes to trust what the other one was saying, but sometimes it really was the truth. And if it wasn't, it would all come out in the wash eventually.

"You just don't get it, Amy," Cassandra said, shaking her head. "I don't know why I expected this relationship to be any different than any of my other relationships. I just can't seem to realize what the universe is telling me: I'm better off alone without any men. I just can't handle any more hurt..." She knew she was losing her face, but at the same time she was too exhausted to care. It felt easier to just let go.

"Just don't call off anything yet," Amy tried to recover what was left to salvage. "You want to be loved, just like everyone else, there's nothing wrong with that. Granted... your taste in men has not been the best up until now," she said carefully, "but I know Caleb and I know he loves you."

"Then how come I don't feel like he does? How would you know any better than me? I'm the one in the relationship!"

The look on Cassandra's face was so desperate that Amy felt like she was looking into the eyes of an abused animal, someone who longed to be comforted and relieved. Amy couldn't hold back any longer, even if she knew Caleb would kill her for this, but Cassandra's feelings were more important than any secret.

"Because Caleb's planning to propose you," Amy finally admitted, knowing she would ruin the whole thing for Cassandra, but at the same time she knew that if she wouldn't do something to convince her friend, there would be no trip or proposal, so the whole thing would be ruined anyway.

Cassandra couldn't believe her ears. "He wants to marry me...? That's why he's been acting like this?" The pieces were starting to fall into their place inside Cassandra's head. "Oh my god..."

Amy watched the expression change on Cass's face as began to realize Caleb's feelings for her were true.

"Oh my god..." her voice changed from apologetic to excited as she began to realize what it would mean for her. That she would not have to break up with Caleb because he was planning to spend the rest of his life with her. "Oh my god, he's proposing! He's gonna propose!" Cassandra kept chanting as she walked back to Amy and took her by the hands.

"I'm sorry, I know I ruined the surprise for you, but I just couldn't watch you suffer like that," Amy apologized.

"No, no, no, no!" Cassandra tried to assure her she was not mad. "You just made me so happy!" She gently pulled Amy closer while wrapping her arms around her. Amy felt stiff for a while as she had not expected Cassandra to like the news this much and express her happiness so openly. "Don't apologize."

Cassandra leaned back and watched Amy with a big smile on her face.

"But, Cass..." Amy knew she was a killjoy for saying this, but she only wanted to help her friend in the long run. "I think you should really think about what I said to you. I mean, he might want to propose you and now you know he's not cheating on you, but... what if this happens again? What if you see him with some other girl? Because I know you will, that's just inevitable. Are you still going to think he's cheating you or not? A ring's not going to change anything if you don't trust him to begin with. You can't marry someone you don't trust, it won't lead to anything good."

Cassandra got back to being serious, knowing Amy had a point, but she really didn't want to focus on that right now.

"Well... what am I supposed to do about that?" she asked, shrugging.

"Talk," Amy gave her a simple answer. "Talk things through, and I mean about everything, even the hurtful things. When you know each other well and know what the other one is thinking about different things, you don't have to think about trust - it's just there."

"Yeah, I guess so..." Cassandra nodded, looking down. "It's just been hard for me to let anyone in, because... well, you know. Jeremy, Jesse..." she sighed, knowing how much they had made her fold into herself even more.

"I know, but this is different, it really is," Amy tried to convince her. "If you say yes to his proposal, you're going to spend rest of your life with him, so you have to know him and he has to know you. You shouldn't have to hide your feelings or past because of... shame, or whatever the reason is why you're hiding yourself. He should accept you for what you are - and knowing Caleb, I think he will. I don't think you have anything to worry about. Trust me."

Cassandra smiled a little as she watched back at Amy. "Trust, huh...?"

"Word of the day," Amy said, smiling back.


End file.
